An Open letter to Congressmen John Murtha
Dear Sir,
I know you have been taking a lot of heat lately about your stance on the Marine Corps and the war on Iraq. Know a secret? I just compare you to Lord Darth Vader from “Star Wars.” He, too, was once part of a band of elite fighters, the Jedi Knights, who protected the universe from the dark powers of the “The Force.”
Much like Vader, you succumbed to the dark side of the Force, which blinds you as to the damage you truly cause. It’s no fault of your own; the swell of power that radiates from Washington D.C., can cause any normal person to morph into a dark, sinister person.
Now, I’d like to help you on the war in Iraq. I understand you want our troops out ASAP and short of just dropping tactical nukes on the whole region, we have to figure out a reasonable approach to withdraw our guys and gals. After much thought, here is the answer… “SEX.” Three letters will free an entire region from the grip of these religious leaders and awaken these people to some of the simple pleasures that God has given us and get their minds off jihad.
See, here is the problem and mind you, these observations come from a book titled, The Arab Mind, and some of my own experiences of flying around the world. The culture in the Mideast says, “Women are for babies, men are for fun.” This means young girls are forbidden from having sex until they are married, or face being stoned to death by their religious leaders (this is a religion of peace mind you). Thus, young boys entering puberty are forced to engage in sex with men, and while technically I’m told this isn’t really legal, they just overlook it. According to Wikipedia, when you type in Homosexuality and Islam, Justin Richardson, a professor of psychiatry at Columbia University, says such thinking is backward – it is precisely the extreme restrictions on sexual relations with women that lead to greater prevalence of the behavior. “In some Muslim societies where the prohibition against premarital heterosexual intercourse is extremely high—higher than that against sex between men—you will find men having sex with other males not because they find them most attractive of all but because they find them most attractive of the limited options available to them.”Heck, why do you think our greatest American “King of Pop” took off to live in the Middle East as soon as his trial was over???
No, if you were a young man, raised in that peaceful culture, and were being buggered by your next door neighbor or the boys at school, but all the time wishing you could date a girl, wouldn’t you strap a bomb on your chest and kill yourself too? Think about it—they blow themselves up so that they can have 72 virgins. They wouldn’t know what to do with a girl, but the idea of getting 72 of them is so strong, they are willing to kill themselves. Have you ever wondered why American Muslims aren’t walking into the local Supermarket with C-4 strapped to their chest? I’m sure some radical Imans here in the states have asked a young kid to do his duty so he can go to heaven with 72 hot chicks. The kid is probably nodding his head “yes,” but thinking, “This guy is whacked out of his gourd, I have 100 Virgins in my school right now and sex is no big thing for me, so why the hell would I have to kill myself?”
Back to my cheap solution to the entire problem in the Middle East brought on by centuries of Medieval thought. Just park a satellite directly over the Middle East and beam down free Porno to the masses. We have it on our Dish network, just make it free and send everything down from the skies so that all males, whether a boy, teenager, or man in these countries can view the sinful pleasures of sex with a woman. We export everything else that they despise, but love deep down, so why not Porn??? If a young guy realized there really are such creatures baring everything, maybe they would choose to stay home vice going out to kill themselves. Can you imagine the total disarray that would ensue? Boys skipping noon worship and IED digging duties to watch “Debbie Does Dallas???”
Anyway, just set up a commission to study this idea, and it would cost less then all the money spent investigating Karl Rove or money wasted by those fine taxpayers from New Orleans. Just a thought for you to chew on and think about because I know that deep down in your soul, there still resides the core values that you once held when you were a Marine, and like what happened to Darth Vader, you, too, will also wake up to those feeling again. Good luck Sir and may the Force be with you.
Semper Fi,
Taco
The SandGram 
June 23, 2006 at 5:57 pm
Oh Lord…. I can see it now.
“Marine… I *AM* your fatha”
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
(followed by years of fighting, during which “fatha” Murtha realizes that he fell victim to the Dark Side and can only be cured of his affliction via IED)
Taco,
Your observations about SEX (gotta love 3 letter words, eh?) in Islam was enlightening. I knew about girls being stoned, even if raped, but I didn’t realize that it was common for boys to have homosexual relations until old enough to marry a girl and have a hetero relationship with his wife. Scary… I swear, the more I find out about Islam, the more afraid of them I am. I think they’re part Borg. “You must be assimilated. Resistance is futile”.
June 23, 2006 at 6:54 pm
Bravo, Taco!! What a “secret weapon” vs. the jihadis! The stuff (porno) sure hasn’t improved the morals of America (or Europe)but we don’t generally kill other Americans xcept for drug turf. “Beam it down, Scottie.”
As for “Marine” Murtha, I have the following observations:He’s doing the same damage to our forces overseas, especially the Marines, that the hippie, draft-dodging Left Wing scum did TO HIM & HIS MEN in Vietnam! Also, there aren’t supposed to be any ex-Marines (except those drummed from the Corps on charges)BUT, I can think of 2 who have earned this “title” by their “superior merit” in hurting this country- Lee Harvey Oswald & John Murtha!
June 24, 2006 at 11:24 pm
You have to realize that about 90% of Islam is Illiterate. Therefor, their “religious leaders” dictate to them.
As to Murtha, he ain’t nothin’ but a whore, looking to get elected by far Left whack jobs.
If you looked at HIS bank account, bet you would see either George Soros or Prince Bandahar of Saud as sources
June 24, 2006 at 11:41 pm
Taco, you are the only man I can invision sitting at a table with world leaders saying “Heads up. Just give Debbie Does Dallas a try. It’s that or we bomb ya!” lol
June 25, 2006 at 2:53 am
Hey Taco, good observations. Being any anysoldier.com junkie, we got a letter this week from a young Marine Cpl. who explained all the good things they are doing in Haditha. He felt it was important for us to know because we won’t see it in the news and the group that came before them is getting a bad rap. Tell us Murtha’s big mouth doesn’t hurt morale!! Got any ideas on how we can get Murtha to just shut up?
June 25, 2006 at 3:38 pm
The more I hear about Islam, the more I feel blessed to have been born an American infidel!!!!
June 25, 2006 at 4:36 pm
Taco, Your second book could be entitled “Things Your Parents Didn’t Tell You Because They Never Could Have Dreamed Up Such Things.”
You could always get a doctor’s and soldier’s perpective :).
June 25, 2006 at 6:48 pm
Right on, Taco! Although, sadly, it’s most likely too late for Murtha. He’s been on the dark side too long.
You’re right, those yound Iraqi men need a taste of what they’ve been missing…sex with women, not boys. Or maybe that concept is just too western for them. Blame the infedels for such unclean thoughts! SHEESH!!!
June 25, 2006 at 9:54 pm
Taco,
Brilliant as always!
I was thinking, maybe Murtha needs a little sex and porno to brighten his attitude!
Sam
.
.
June 26, 2006 at 1:16 am
Great Read.
I “blogged it” and linked u to my site for others to enjoy as well.
June 26, 2006 at 6:19 am
Darth Murtha has been busy building his death star.
Or else he is suffering from dementia and controlled by the dark side.
It’s hard to believe that he spent so long in the Corps and he thinks Okinawa is the best place to station our troops.
s for the brokeback
islamaniacs, you may have something there.
June 26, 2006 at 3:48 pm
‘Bout time someone talked about this little problem! You have the perfect answer, Taco. It should be implemented in Afghanistan as well. My AnyMarine Lcpl. told me about “Happy Thursday, Sad Friday” where villages would trade the “prettiest” young men, have fun with them, then ask the American doctors to stitch them up the next day. Nice custom, eh?
I like Ben’s term “brokeback islamaniacs”.
Semper Gratus!
June 26, 2006 at 3:49 pm
‘Bout time someone talked about this little problem! You have the perfect answer, Taco. It should be implemented in Afghanistan as well. My AnyMarine Lcpl. told me about “Happy Thursday, Sad Friday” where villages would trade the “prettiest” young men, have fun with them, then ask the American doctors to stitch them up the next day. Nice custom, eh?
I like Ben’s term “brokeback islamaniacs”.
Semper Gratus!
June 27, 2006 at 1:21 pm
American humor… ah yes grasshopper, may The Force be with all of us, including Debbie, Dallas, US homosexuals (& hetrosexuals) and with thinking teenagers. Lord knows The Force is already with the Marines. This American Mom so enjoyed your post Major, thank you so much for saying things out loud.
June 27, 2006 at 10:32 pm
Oh, well said, Taco…. I totally agree with Mrs Diva….. why don’t you run for Office? I hear there is this great big movement where alot ovf veterans are starting to run for office, and they are being received very well……
Then you, too, could stand on the floor of the Senate and tell Murtha to blow it out……
I LOVED that lady! Bet they’d pay 4377 trying to force you to apologize!
June 28, 2006 at 7:42 pm
Oh, Taco – That’s great stuff! I forwarded it to share the fun — got rave reviews 🙂
You could be onto something!
June 29, 2006 at 1:37 pm
Taco, you maniac… You did crack me up with this post. You may have something there! Stay well
June 29, 2006 at 6:30 pm
Good Stuff!!! Funny, and at the same time, true. I lived amongst the Islamic population of Turkey (Turkiye) for over 2 years and spent some time in the “Kingdom” and I whole-heartedly agree!