The SandGram

“Chunky”

Dear Gang,
You know, call signs and acronyms are abundant in the Military and the Marines so I thought I would talk about that today for those of you new to my blog. This will help you non-military types understand the lingo that you may encounter out there in Cyberland when reading other MilBlogs.

As a pilot, you usually get a call sign for doing something stupid or its part of your name somehow. I think I could write a book based solely on this topic. As a former KC 130 pilot with the last name of Bell, and the type guy whose love of Mexican food causes massive odiferous odors to exude from my orifice, well, there you go…TacoBell. There is a flight surgeon running around out there named “Warf” because of his bad hair transplant, his head looks like the security officer from Star Trek TNG. Poor guy never figured out why he was always losing at poker when it was his night to host the game… in his office and his examination mirror was right behind him.

We had a Sgt. named Reilly, but we called him ripsaw because he could tear through anything and get the job done. Of course there was Major Ward, “Wardo”, and his constant copilot, “Muscles” (liked to work out and he was big too). Then it’s not to hard to imagine why some are called what they are, there is “Toecheese” (smelly boots-socks-feet, “Cocheese” (part Indian), and “Chowhound” (would eat your hand if it’s too close to his tray). With a last name like Flanagan, of course his call-sign is “Father” but we can’t forget the best one like “Wedge” (because he was the simplest tool known to man). Others I recall were “Rainman”, “Sticks”, “C.B.” (chatter box, she talks a lot), “HeHaw” , “Chuckles”, “Chunky” (puked in his helmet bag in flight school and it’s stuck since). I always liked my buddy Malcolm’s callsign “Roth La Doad”, (red on the head like a dick on a dog) or my old roommate at another base, “YFB” –Young Fighting Blanch. Then my other buddy there “Tattoo” a Huey pilot, remember fantasy Island (ZZZeee Plane Boss). We call our young lance Cpl “Leg Hound” because he’s like my Colonel’s old dog, which would take off chasing the UPS van and not come home for hours. This kid will get the keys to our vehicle to make a short errand, then three hours later he’ll be spotted on the other side of the base with the windows down, head bouncing up and down, cover tilted to the side and country music blaring. We were just short of having the QRF (quick reaction force) plant him down face first on the deck for grand theft auto. We ended up putting a BOLO (Be on the look out) out on all the radios for our LegHound.

Then you are running around trying to figure out the chat stuff on the computer such as “Mams” military aged male suspect and BB’s are Burka Babes. BBGW’s refers to the gals washing their clothes along the river banks but that is in hopes that they would take it off and go swimming (never happens) then they would be Burka Babes gone wild. “Tits” (kids who are doing the dirty work digging IED holes hence Terrorist in Training), “NP” no problem, “TY” thank you, “C/S” call sign, “ISO” in support of, and of course ETD/ETA not to be confused with IED or IDF (Improvised Explosive device/In Direct Fire). SAF should sound like special armed forces but means Small arms fire while the “TIC” is troops in contact and CBRU is cancelled by requesting Unit.

The “head” is a bathroom, “deck” is floor, “hatch” is a door, “butts” are cigarettes, “Smoking deck” is a place to smoke said cigarettes. The chow hall is just that, the hodgies (really Hadji’s but Hodge is a buddies name) are either the name of the guys working in the chow hall who are really “TCN’s” (third world country nationals) and the “LCN’s” (Local country Nationals, Iraqi’s in this case) or the guys lobbing rockets at you. I prefer Chucklehead for the bad guys, although, Ass clowns has been tossed around a lot. The Hodgies or TCN’s who have the market on the haircuts here are really from Tibet and nice guys. They give you a hair cut and short massage which we call the Hodgie Man Massage, not to be construed with “HML” Hodgie Man Love stuff that goes on, another subject. (read a book called the Arab mind)

Skids are Hueys, and slicks are Cobra’s and the CH-46 is called a Phrog (Frog) and they are all located on the Lilly pad, their tie-down area. You’ll hear guys talk about the “Big Voice” which is the alarm that goes off when we get rocket attacks. All time is in the 24 hours fashion 0100 is 1am thru 12pm then add 12 to the twelve hours so 1pm for you is 1300 for us. We run on Zulu time which is English time but we’re 3 hours ahead here so “C” time is Zulu plus three, most confusing if someone tells you the VIPs are showing up at 1300 and the entire staff is out waiting for Senator X to arrive only that was really 1600 local… you can see the problems that arise from that. Well I hope you gained a better understanding of our language here, not as hard as say German, but it does takes a bit of getting used to. Everything here is “GTG” good to go, so you guys have a “kick butt” day and I’ll talk to you soon.
Semper Fi,
Taco

Tags: The SandGram v1.0